Verified by Psychology Today. Evidence-Based Living. As a first-time parent, I was completely surprised one day when I was nearly overcome by the urge to spank my two-year-old.
By Bonnie Schiedel Nov 5, Photo: iStockphoto. His son and daughter, aged three and five, were bickering in another room.
Verified by Psychology Today. Moral Landscapes. Parents use spanking generally in order to reduce undesirable behavior and increase desirable behavior, but because it is targeted toward an undesirable behavior, spanking can only possibly meet the first parenting goal.
Last week, the trial of the Rev. Thomas Chantry, a Baptist pastor from Arizona who has been accused of multiple counts of child molestation, began. When a parent finally questioned Chantry about the beatings, he admitted to spanking children in his care but denied the other allegations, which include molesting children as young as 9 years old. Chantry felt comfortable acknowledging the spankings because our culture still refuses to recognize spanking as a sex act when inflicted on little kids.
The way America is going on the child discipline front — cops in Florida are being asked to supervise corporal punishment of children — soon no one will be able to understand a fundamental story of my childhood:. So I better tell it soon. It comes from the hard mountain villages in the old country where our people come from.
Stay up-to-date on this on-going discipline debate. When it comes to raising children, nothing sends parents scurrying to opposite corners faster than the word spanking. Forget debates about breast versus bottle or working versus staying at home: The issue of whether or not to use physical punishment continues to be one of the fiercest conversations parents have.
Spanking is one of the most widely debated parenting topics. For many parents, spanking can feel like the fastest and most effective way to change a child's behavior. And it often works in the short-term.
Were you spanked as a child? Then you may think it's a good way to guide a child. Or maybe you don't want to spank, but you find yourself doing it because you don't know how else to get through to your child.
Because of the sensitive nature of spanking, the names of the children in this story have been changed. I didn't learn from it very well. I just felt like I was a bad person.