I love bondage! Hello my dear reader! This is a question that I get a lot, and most of the time I have to ask for clarification as to what, exactly, people are talking about—BDSM is a GIANT umbrella category that encompasses many different acts and attitudes.
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Ahhhh, topping from the bottom. Not every kinkster plays with a safeword. Having the safeword and believing it will be honored is a mark of your trust in your Dominant.
Topping refers to being the dominant partner in sex. The designated top takes control of the act and commands the designated bottom to abide by their will. Topping requires a person to lead the orgasmic dance. Thus, a top has to know what they're doing.
I often say that all consensual sexuality is okay. Open relationships? Same-sex partnerships?
Find out how you can explore whether or not you might be one. So I thought about it long and hard. I have always been someone involved in service my entire life.
I did, however, run across someone saying a lot of things about topping that resonated with me, and that I will share for that reason. Over at Cuntlove, Cleofaye writes about her shift from bottoming exclusively to topping female and male partners. She says:.
Topping from the bottom is an action of body, behavior and attitude that indicates someone in an S-type status role is attempting to control a situation they have already negotiated and given informed Consent to their respective D-type in a Power exchange dynamic. Topping from the bottom is explicitly not an s-type informing a d-type of needs and wants during negotiation phases or during periods of distress. These are instead responsible communications. Frequently this term used as a derogatory term towards an s-type who either pushes the D-type to act more dominant towards them attempts to control how they dominate or tries to maintain control of situation after they have agreed to give up control in that instance.
What some dominants consider acceptable, others will be angered by. For other players, this type of behaviour is deeply disrespectful to the dominant. There are a range of practices that might be considered topping from the bottom depending on the circumstances.
Topping from the bottom is a misunderstood term in BDSM, especially if you are a novice. The idea behind the term is to help submissives understand their role, and isn't more than a faux pas. During interactions with your Dominant, it's a lesson to know that you can't control what is going on. Topping from the bottom is when you simultaneously adopt both roles.
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